Sunday, March 27, 2011

You can't throw a stone in this town without hitting someone you know....

March 27, 2011

So as Jozefina continues on my cupid crusade, I'm still occasionally logging in to check messages and see who's viewed my OK Cupid profile. Plus I get to see who Jozefina has been viewing on my behalf....and discover that she has slightly modified my profile.  Nice!  Thanks, babe.

To be honest, I've already had to "hide" a few guys.  But not for creepy reasons.  Well, some for creepy reasons, but that's a whole other blog posting.  One guy I believed to be someone from high school, and another guy that I see out in DC on a regular basis, were blocked a few weeks ago.  Both were in the 90% match category, but my pride is worth far too much!  (Some could argue that this is why I'm still single...)

A few days ago I noticed yet another guy I recognized on my newsfeed - about an 80% compatible match.  This guy, let's call him John, happened to have attended my annual ski trip at Wisp this past January.  John was a friend of a friend of a friend.  

Mentally I thought "I should let Jozefina know he's on here," so she doesn't view his profile or message him.  Once I even considered hiding him, but I just didn't have the energy to walk over to my computer, turn it on and go through the trouble.  Plus Jozefina had gone on the ski trip and so I assumed she would have recognized him and not bothered, right?

Wrong.

Out of the blue Sunday night Jozefina calls me from California.  Her voice is strained, I can't make out what she's saying and she asks me if I'm alone.  I panic and think she's crying.  No, no.  She's fine.  Actually, she's laughing so hard she can't speak.

Turns out that she's emailed John.  She didn't recognize him from the ski trip and this is his response:

        "First thing... Should I assume this is Vanessa or Jozefina who apparently has 
        been given full access to your account. (Uh Oh).  Maybe my pictures are too 
        old that they don't look like me.... But I figured after a few nights of sleeping 
        under the same roof together that I might have been somewhat memorable. 
        Sadly not. Well, that said, if you remember who I am (hint... one of your  
        383 FB friends), I would be up for a drink. Have a great night!"

Busted!

Ahhh...good laughs.  If we make it past the embarrassment I'll consider going out with him for sure!  Give it a week...or two.

Friday, March 25, 2011

"You Need to Date Against Yourself"

This is the first of what I hope to be many blogs over the course of the next 40 days.  My friends have asked me to start capturing my dating escapades on a blog site, since my Facebook status only allows for so many characters.  So here goes...
 
And begins the story....

The other day my friend, Jozefina, and I were at brunch discussing the number of people we know who are happily-coupled.  In all actuality we were bitching at how those who we thought would NEVER marry have somehow found themselves overseas, in an exotic land, in love and settled down.  How even the most unattractive individuals in DC are walking around Dupont's farmer's market hand-in-hand.  (There goes my theory on dating Darwinism.) We were wondering how two successful, fit, and good-looking women like us don’t have men yet?  

For the past 5 years I have told myself that I’m just too busy to date, that my career...and then my education....and then my career, again, should come first.  I frequently used the line “I’m a little busy.  If the right guy is out there, he’ll find me.”  But after carrying on with girl's nights out, networking events, speed dating attempts, responses to long-winded eHarmony Q&As, first date set ups, and even joining a kickball team, I’m starting to think that the right guy is a little busy himself and that now it’s my turn to look for HIM!

So then Jozi, my wise and equally gorgeous and single friend, looks me straight in the eye and says “You need to date against yourself. It’s the guys that you’re picking that aren’t working out.  You need to go out with the guys that you wouldn’t usually like and maybe THEN it would work out.”

Wow.  

Profound.

So, I have been fucking this up for myself the whole time? 

Actually, the answer to that is “yes.”  And I know it.  I know that the men I tend to be attracted to are NOT the right ones for me, but in the words of Liza (another wise and gorgeous friend who recently found herself a new BF during an intense night of speed dating) “Mujer, que te pasa?  Erres masoquista?”  Translation: “What’s wrong with you?  Are you a masochist?”  

So starting on March 21, 2011, Jozefina will have full access to my OK Cupid profile and screen all eligible candidates for me until end of April.  She will draft the initial introduction note or “wink” comment; she will sort through my inbox and for any man that initiates first contact with me, she will screen and determine if a response is warranted; and even in real life she will advise me on any man who approaches me.  
In other words, I am relinquishing control of my own dating life and putting this fine responsibility on Jozefina.  She has full control of who I date, call (a return call, of course), text (same), and overall interact with over the next 40 days.

Get ready ladies.  This is about to get interesting....